Chimes ring into my ears as I take the last sip of my coffee under the shade of a leafless tree. And the sun warms my back and everyone is busy, moving with the pace of time as if the world is about to come to a stop. Cigar ashes, under my foot. And dead leaves from the violent winds of winter. And the lazy air that puts me to an erotic spell.
The chimes are forks and spoons, tied to a string, hung from the empty branches. The wind blows my thoughts away, liberates me from internal pain, and makes me too satisfied with my current state of being.
I have stripped myself away from my shoes and the chains of winter. The boy who spoke, not too long ago, in French walks past me and I am sleeping to the sound of bells and sunshine.
Call me a fool. But a happy fool who lives by simplicity, sometimes lazily and selfishly, always looking for satisfaction. Call me an idiot who believes despite the odds. Call me pathetic. And I will still sit here with an empty cup as the wind blows my newly dyed red hair from east to west, as the sun melts me and deliberately shuts my eyes, because I can. I do it because I can. Because it makes me happy and because it makes me believe that soon I will have what I have dreamed of for so long.
If you tell me I can’t have it because the world doesn’t work that way, I will say you are the fool. I will say you are the idiot because the things you want are right in front of you. Because you are blind and you think everything is difficult when it is too fucking easy to have it all.
So don’t call me pathetic. Don’t call me a fool because you are only fooling yourself.
Take off your shoes and feel the ground with the sole of your feet because it’s good to live without rules. It’s good to drink ridiculous amounts of coffee and listen to music with high volume.
And while you do that, I am going to sit here and watch those who rush because they have bounded themselves to compete with time…